The tweets I would tweet if I tweeted

Sorry, "tweet" is just such a fun word! Freshman year, my major advisor called me into his office and told me that he and a couple grad students were deciding how to translate "Twitter," "tweet," and "to tweet" into Latin, and he wanted my vote. Good times were had by all.

Unfortunately, the Internet doesn't work well enough to find the email that announced the results...I know y'all are all devastated.

And admittedly, I was on Twitter for a hot second and I DID tweet a couple of these, but whatever.

-----

I just love when flies land on my not-yet-covered cut. It makes me feel so clean and not at all like I'm actively contracting diseases.

Just poured popcorn seasoning into my hand and ate it by itself. I think I should be ashamed of that, but I'm really not.

It's blustery and cloudy and I hear thunder in the distance! Rejoice! Oh wait...no, that's just a donkey cart rolling by 😔

I would really appreciate it if the 5am bus would come by before the skies open up... #its510 #yourelate #letsgo

Cat, you do realize that if you're going to eat the lizards in the house, you're going to need to start eating the bugs, too, right?

But actually: popcorn seasoning...can't stop, won't stop

My snapchat friends are the only non-PC Americans to see me without make up with any sort of regularity. Feel special? #youshould #not #sorryfriends

Today I learned that stitches in Burkina Faso are a two-person job - bc someone has to hold the flashlight.

Not sure why "doesn't hurt as bad as a hardback book when you're reading in bed and you drop it on your face" isn't a part of Kindle advertising.

Do volunteers love the rain bc it brings cooler weather or bc it provides a legitimate excuse to be a hermit? #theworldmayneverknow

So my cat eats couscous, what of it? #normal

I think it takes a certain courage to turn down a free A/C room to bike 30 min to your home w no electricity. Or maybe that's just stupidity?

Only in Burkina would someone think that 6am is an appropriate time for a visit or a phone call...

Oh child...it's almost funny that you think fake tears (or real ones, for that matter) will get you another bonbon. What kind of amateur do you think I am?

-----

xo, chlo

Schools out for summer!!!

...well, almost.

I still have to fill out report cards, but other than that, I'm DONE! with a year of teaching! I find that a bit terrifying, but whatever.

So what does an education volunteer do over the 4-month-long summer vacation? (We start back Oct 1)

1. Help out at camps

I have two friends putting on camps - one right at the beginning of the summer (next week) and the other at the very end. I haven't done a camp yet, so I can't say for sure what I'll be doing, but basically it'll mean spending a week at their sites and helping with lessons and activities. Different camps have different themes depending on the interest of the volunteer, but I think both of the camps I'm going to will be mostly health-related.

2. Cultivate???

My village (like most in Burkina) is very agricultural; I would guess that there are less than 20 people in my 1300-person village who are not subsistence farmers. And even for those who aren't (e.g., my neighbor, Alice, is a midwife), their families are, and they help when they're not at work.

My neighbors promise me that they'll teach me how to cultivate, even though a couple of my students have expressed doubt at my ability to do so. (Because I'm white. Not cool, dude, not cool.)

I've been told that I could/should grow corn and peanuts in my courtyard...soooo, we'll see.

3. Help out at the health clinic with weekly baby weighings

Again, I haven't done this yet, so I have no idea what it involves. I'm guessing it has something to do with babies and scales. Also probably writing things down.

4. Travel!

In July I have a friend coming to visit (!!!!), so in addition to hanging in village a bit, we're going to go to SW Burkina where there are some cool touristy things (Banfora Falls, Sindou Peaks, Fabedougou Domes, and Tengrela Lake).

And thennnnn in September, my friend Meghan (another volunteer) and I are going to Morocco for two weeks!! Blue cities, leather, camels, sand surfing...I'm beyond pumped.

5. PLAY WITH MY NEW CAT!!!!!

That's right!!! I have a cat! Look out mice! 

His name is Indi(-ana Jones), and he is very cuddly, which of course I adore. I just got him this morning but I'm already in love! And not only because he already seems to understand that the appropriate place to go to the bathroom is outside.

6. Hope to get a dog

No explanation needed. I really want a dog. My friend Diana's dog is pregnant, so if I don't get one before then, I'll snag one of her pups. But that's gonna take so long! :/

Whenever number 6 works out, then there's also:

7. Train my dog

Because, duh. No one likes an untrained dog.

8. Read all the books ever

I just (/finally) started Game of Thrones. I was making myself wait until I finished school because I knew that once I started, it'd be hard to stop for pesky little things like lesson plans and grading. I'm finding that this was a good move.

...The end!

I didn't think I had much to do this summer, but after writing it out, I think it'll fly by! 

xo, chlo

Children as Allies

Children are my greatest allies in this country.

That's probably not a surprise to many of you, but what may be surprising is how valuable they are as allies here. I hinted at this in the "minions" post, but kids here are incredibly independent. After all, if they're available to take orders for a random adult, it's because they're doing their own thing.

With their independence comes...

...responsibility

I find it very interesting that animals (cows, goats, sheep), despite often being the most valuable possessions a family has, are entrusted to small children. If a child is big enough to hold a stick and follow orders, s/he is big enough to herd a few cows and supervise their grazing for the day. Once a kid's weight is at least comparable to that of a goat, one of the morning chores becomes dragging said goat (or several) by a rope to an area with some foliage and tying it to a tree for the day.

<< one of my favorite mental images is from one morning a few months ago, when I saw my neighbor, Ida, trying to drag a stubborn goat. I happened to look over when she was at a nearly-45-degree angle with the ground, and that goat barely budged! >>

...and power.

I.E., the power to look out for their sweet, lonely little Nasara neighbor! (Yes, I just liked how dramatic it sounded to call it power)

Kids would do a lot for any adult, but I like to thing that they do the following because they like me. ;)

-- I cannot tell you how many fruit deliveries I've gotten. Not all of them are entirely welcome (someone already gave me four mangoes today...what am I supposed to do with six more?!), but I like to encourage it, so I always accept them.

-- I already mentioned that adults don't have to pump their water if there are kids at the pump, but sometimes kids come to my door asking if I need/want them to go get water for me! I will admit that these kids are likely soliciting candy, but whatever.

BUT MOSTLY:

-- My neighbors sell dolo (local beer made from red sorghum) Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Sundays. Anyone can bring a bottle and have it filled to take home, but most choose to hang out under surrounding trees, etc. (NB: it's never too early to drink dolo - I've been stopped to share a calabash at 7am) Any time I leave on a "dolo day," I have to pass through everyone hanging out.

One Tuesday morning, I was coming home from my class and after I passed through the dolo area, I heard someone yelling after me. I look and see an older woman leaving the dolo area to follow me to my house (probably 100+ yards away). I'm confused, but I figure she must want to talk to me about something, so I stop outside my gate.

THEN! I see about 6-8 of my neighbor kids sprinting towards me, with the strong-willed Isa (not to be confused with Ida, goat dragger) leading the pack with an arm outstretched and a finger wagging at me to match her cry of "Chloe! No!"

By now I'm really confused, but I trust these kids so I know something must be up. And then she arrives (immediately followed by my child-warriors), and it becomes clear. From her mannerisms and speech, she seems to have some sort of developmental problem, but more importantly was how aggressively she was demanding money from me. Darling Isa kept a close eye to make sure I wouldn't give in (as if I would), and all of the kiddos were poised to intervene if her grabby-ness took a turn towards violence. They stuck around until she left, saw me safely locked in my courtyard, and then went on their merry way.

Of course, I could have handled it without their backup, but witnesses are always appreciated -- especially witnesses with numbers on your side...and it's great to know that they're looking out for me, even if they are "just" kids! :)

xo, chlo

Children as Minions

One thing Burkina does really well with its children is instilling a sense of respect for one's elders. Actually, "blind obedience" might be more accurate. There are exceptions to every rule, of course, and obviously American children are (generally) expected to obey/respect adults too, but not to the same degree as Burkinabe kids. The evidence is as follows, in roughly chronological order...

Evidence #1

Setting: Pre-Service Training, a bar after class

We arrived at one of our favorite spots only to learn that they were out of boxes of wine. After a brief discussion with the girl I was going to share one with, I decided to go on a hunt among the nearby boutiques and bring it back. As I was leaving, one of the "peace corps volunteer facilitators" (PCVFs, a current volunteer helping w our training) said, "you know you can just give money to a kid and make them go it, right?"

Well, that would certainly be easier, now wouldn't it? Done.

Evidence #2

Setting: My village, during site visit

My homologue and I had just eaten lunch at my village's only bar/restaurant, and we were walking back to my house. About five minutes down the road, he realized that he'd forgotten his phone at the restaurant. Did we turn around and go get it? Surely not! A child was nearby!

"Hey kid! I forgot my phone at the restaurant, go get it."

Run along now, we'll just be waiting here in the shade...

Evidence #3

Setting: My house, end of rainy season

My courtyard was rather overcome with weeds, and even though my neighbor had told me, "you should make the kids remove that," I hadn't done much about it.

Thankfully, my homologue took matters into his own hands, and had five 5eme students come by after class one day after their classes and take care of business. It took them an hour, but I gave them water and candy, and they seemed content with the trade.

Evidence #4

Setting: My school

The director of my school had offered to let me borrow a table/desk for my house, and there it was, ready to go. Morning classes were over, and I was wondering how it would get to my house (almost 2k away). My homologue -- clearly this man knows what's up -- simply asked a group of boys if they were going in the direction of my house (they were) and instructed them to bring it for me.

After a couple tries carrying between two people's bikes, one of them decided that (a) it wasn't that heavy, and (b) my house wasn't that far.

So, he just put it upside down on his head, balanced it with one hand, and started off for my house.

And that's how I got my first piece of furniture.

Evidence #5

Setting: My house

I'd been wanting to build a tippy tap (Google it) in my courtyard, but had no wood to make it, and no machete to cut any from surrounding trees. 

Enter: Joe, my sweet neighbor boy (he's like 15)

So Joe came by one morning to bring me some fruit ( << more on this is my next post, "children as allies"), and I recognized his arrival as the opportunity that it was. After all, if he had time then to pick fruit and bring it to his neighbor, he must not be too busy with chores and such, right?

I asked if he could do something for me (yes), explained what I wanted (no problem), and he came back not 20 minutes later with everything I needed. I paid him with candy, fully expecting him to be on his way, and then he said, "don't you want me to dig the holes?"

Well, if you want to, I certainly won't stand in your way, young Joseph.

Evidence #6:

Some guidelines // Things that happen so often that they don't merit their own stories

(Yes, I know some of the above may not have merited their own stories either. Whatever.)

- if a child is a the pump, an adult does not pump water. Also adults with children big enough to pump water are rarely at the pump to begin with

- if a teacher wants juice/gateau/peanuts from the ladies selling them at school, s/he does not have to walk all the way over there and get it

- if a mother is busy, a baby is strapped to its sibling's back just as easily

- if you need to give something to someone (i.e., a phone that you were charging for your neighbor), just snag a kid to deliver it for you

- if you can't find something in the marché, ask a tantie and she'll send her kid with you to show you where it is

Hope everyone is enjoying life in America without minions! Suckers... ;)

xo, c

My life in Snaps

In honor of the following text:

"Also, your most recent snap stories don't look very third-world-country-esque"

...I decided to share some of the snaps that I'd be sending to yall if I had enough phone-ternet to do so in village.

I apologize in advance.

My classes/rugrats

I teach 6ème and 5ème SVT, which is only three hours a week for each class. I may add an English class or two next year because I feel like a bit of a slacker compared to the other teachers.

Also, I call them rugrats, and in terms of their schooling, they still have 5-6 years to go before they could go to University, but age-wise they're older than you might think! 5ème is 15-16ish, and 6ème is 14-15ish.

In 6ème I have 69 students, and in 5ème I have 88. That's pretty normal among volunteers, although some have classes of 100+....yikes.

Needless to say, classroom management was a daunting prospect before I started, but I think I've been managing pretty well... How, might you ask?

Okay. It's time to confess...

I may or may not have re-read Harry Potter during training when we were discussing classroom management and group work. So I figured, why not   get some team spirit up in this place and have a little competition?

Each class has four teams (not houses, sorry) based on the four columns of desks in the classroom. They win points for participating in class and doing well on tests. They lose points by being disruptive, cheating on tests, or deciding that they don't want to take notes that day. At the end of the year, everyone on the winning team gets a point added to their average.

It was a little hard to explain the idea at first, but once I started dishing out points for participation, they got very competitive very quickly. ;)

When I was home for Tess' wedding, I got candy for my students, a week or so after I gave it to them, they started begging for more. The new rule was this: if EVERY team has more points than Madame by the end of the year, I'll bring candy again...BUT since I already brought 69/88 pieces of candy, I started off with 69/88 points. (I had to catch up somehow!)

Just for your enjoyment, here are the team names:

6ème: Butterflies, Cats, Lions, Rabbits

5ème: Lions, Panthers, Workers (lol), and my personal favorite... Team Solidarity (hahahahhahaah)

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the little weirdos:

---

Student A: Meow...meow...

Student B: Madame, it's the cats! Minus 2!

---

(Going over the test)

Me: Okay, if you only wrote this part, I gave you 1 point because I'm nice.

Student A: THANK YOU Madame!!! Plus 2, you're nice!

Student B: No, only plus 1...

---

Student A: Madame, we're done, right? We're hungry...

Me: I'm hungry too! But we're not finished. We have to finish this page.

Student B: Madame!!!! That's so much!!!

Student C: Minus 2 from Madame!

---

This past week they've been begging me to add points to their averages...

Me: No, ce n'est pas necessaire

Students A and B: Madame! C'est NECESSAIRE!!

<< after that same class, a couple of my favorite girls were walking in the same direction as me - NOTE they're both the type that like to pretend they're sassy, but really they're super sweet >> 

Student A: Madame...I am not happy.

Student B: Yeah Madame, not nice...

---

And last but certainly not least....

I took these pictures during the last tests.

The one from the back of the classroom is 5ème, and the one from the front is 6ème.

Can you spy the clown (Cedric) in 6ème who caught me taking the picture? Kid's cheesin hard. ;)

xo, c

School in BF

Hello friends!!!

It's been a while! 

In honor of the end of the trimester, I thought I'd tell y'all a bit about my classes.

First things first... Some things about the education system here don't make a lot of sense to us Americans. There's definitely room for improvement, but very little of that change can be done on the village-level -- schools have to comply with the Ministry of Education, after all. Teachers and schools do the best with the system they have (admittedly, some are more motivated and do better than others, but that's to be expected) but no matter how good your teachers are, it's really hard to succeed as a student here.

Here's the general info first, and then my next post will be specifics about MY little hooligans!

SCHOOL YEAR

The school year starts on October 1st, and as I said, we're on the trimester system. Although each trimester is weighted equally in terms of grades, the third trimester is only about a month and a half long.

GRADE LEVELS

(Apparently this is the French system, but don't quote me on that)

After primary school (and after passing the national standardized test), you start with "sixième" (6ème), which means "6th." It basically means "sixth from the end," and after 6ème, you continue to 5ème (fifth from the end), etc.

After 3ème, you take another national standardized test, which you must pass before continuing on to seconde and premiere, and the last year is called "terminale." After terminale, you take the final, big terrifying test (the BAC) and if you do well, you can go to University.

CLASSES

At my school, we have one class per grade level, but bigger schools may have a couple sections for the lower grades. At my school (and I think this is normal), 6ème and 5ème are the largest classes, and then they continue to get whittled down by pass rates as the years go on. 

Each class (grade level/section of grade level) has its own classroom, and teachers move between classrooms to teach their classes.

COURSES

In 6ème, students (at my school) have the following classes:

History/Geography

French

English (their first English class)

Math

SVT ("Science de la vie and de la terre" is biology)

In 4ème (I think!) they add physics and chemistry (one class, "PC" - physics for first half of the year, chemistry for the second)

SCHOOL DAY

Classes start at the ungodly hour of 7am. Every day, a group of students in each class sweeps the classroom before the first class...in theory... I have 6ème at 7am on Monday mornings and we never start before 7:10 because "Madame, they haven't swept yet!" 😑

Classes are 55 minutes long, but sometimes have double blocks.

"Recreation" is from 9:45-10:15, and women come to sell juice and snacks to the students (and teachers 😉).

Morning classes finish at noon, and some days (probably 2/5), afternoon classes will start at 3 and end by 5.

Stay tuned for specifics and let me know if I left anything out!

xo, c